This is a challenge. But it's more than that - it's a cleansing. And I need it. I'm going to set the stage for you:
27 year old female. Living in Toronto for 7.5 years. Graduated high school at 17. Interned at 19. Graduated college at 20. Started working full time at age 20.
I began my work in the music industry in digital content. For me, it was a starting point. I worked hard - I advanced. I was always ambitious, and I made that clear to those I worked for & those I worked with. If you aren't clear about what you want in life, you risk not getting it because you're overlooked.
When I felt I had advanced about as far as I wanted to, I left the company and joined a television company in their digital business division. My role turned into an admin assistant role, and I quickly made it clear that it was NOT what I had been hired to do - and not what I wanted to be doing. My boss (for a very short spell - but I owe him a lot) sat me down & asked me what I had an interest in doing. He told me he felt my talents were being wasted. I told him Project Management interested me. About two weeks later, my title was changed, and I joined the Project Management team full time.
I was thrown in the deep end. I got a major project to start, and I ran with it. I loved it, but there were some things I did not love. I'm not big on office politics, or people that sling mud. Fast forward 4 years, many projects of all sizes, plenty of project team members, and here I am.
Although that's not the WHOLE story. While at my first job, I felt I needed to nurse my creativity. So I started a company that specialized in event solutions. I planned events, staffed bartenders & servers, and built up a loyal client-base. I still have these clients. I stopped advertising long ago - I couldn't keep up with it AND doing my full-time job.
About 2.5 years ago, I started to get these incredibly debilitating migraines. There was a constant pain above my right eye. At times, it is bearable. Other times, I cannot move. My quality of life has spiralled endlessly. I've gone to MANY specialists, I've missed tons of work & activities outside of work. I've gained 40+ pounds. I've experienced crippling pain, crippling depression, and crippling anxiety. Finally, I reached my breaking point. I submitted a request for leave from my job for 2 months. It was a complicated process, but I've gotten approval, and my leave begins on Sept 20th (that's the Saturday morning after my last day).
I won't be bringing in any money from my job - I am not going on disability. I am planning to spend the entire 65 days taking care of MYSELF. I am going to be purposely selfish.
I have a few advantages in that I have no dependents. I've saved enough money to pay my bills for those two months. I have support from family & friends. I've started this blog to document what I hope will be my transformation. I haven't been happy - truly happy - in too long. I need to rediscover what I want to do without the pressures of what I have to do.
So, without further ado, here are some of the most important items on my to-do list:
- Develop a new routine. It would be far too easy for me to sleep until noon every day. I am vowing to not let that happen.
- Meditate. I need to spend more time getting out of my head, and relaxing thoughtfully.
- Run. I've ceased running since my headaches started, but I love it. Even if I'm only able to do a short jaunt every day, I will get out of the house with my sneakers on.
- Study. It's important to keep learning. I plan to spend a chunk of each day studying for my Project Management Professional (PMP) certification exam.
- Eat. With free time, it will be much easier to cook healthy meals for myself. I plan to eat to live, not live to eat.
- Indulge. With the above point, I am planning not to deprive myself either. I will focus on everything in moderation.
- Relax. I am going to take a week long vacation on a beach with a good friend who I know will help me achieve all of the above in our own way. This week is meant for eating, drinking & relaxing - likely all in excess. I am also vowing not to feel bad about it.
- Purge. I need to simplify my life. An easy step in this is planning to get a large chunk of junk out of my house - things I don't need, no longer use, etc. Whether I sell or donate, it's gotta go.
- Reflect. Particularly through the use of this blog, I am planning on figuring out what I really want out of life. What makes me happy, and what negativity I can purge from my life. I am going to document as many days as I can - what went well, what didn't and what tomorrow looks like.
- Work. Contrary to how it sounds, I am planning to work on two business ventures - one of my own (my event planning) and one with a friend (who I've talked about working with for a long time). But note that work is lower on the priority list - because my health & happiness are more important right now.
To anyone that will follow me through this journey: I hope, if nothing else, it inspires you to take a step back & look at your life. Whether you reflect on all you're thankful for, find negative things to cut out, or decide to go on a similar journey yourself, it is always worthwhile to look around & audit our happiness. You are always worth making changes for - whether they be internal or external - to live your best life.
Onwards, and upwards...
Devin
No comments:
Post a Comment